Do you choose how you act or react when an unexpected situation arises? – or – Do you normally accept the situation and suffer the consequences?

Your happiness may depend on how you answered.

In a recent publication of Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences, they presented a study run over 25 years in Australia which shows that happiness is based on choice and the life goals that each of us sets.  Happiness is greater for those who know how to choose than it is among those who simply accept life as it happens.

We may not be able to change what happens, but we can choose how we react to what happens.

Bonnie Fatio

Age Esteemers take responsibility for their own happiness.  They know that no one else can make you happy.  Riches cannot make you happy.  You are responsible for your happiness.

There is a lovely saying, « If you want to be happy, just be happy! »  It is as easy as that.  Happiness depends on you.  If you want to be happy, decide to be happy.  Curl up the corners of your mouth.  Put a smile on your face and look up.  It will change your whole perspective.

• Practice smiling.  Smile at yourself in the mirror.  Smile at people you meet.  Smile just for the pleasure of smiling, and see what happens.
• Smile when you wake up in the morning, even before you open your eyes; and make it the last thing you do at night before you drift off to sleep.
• Look for the happiness around you; look for the humor in the day.

Bonnie Fatio

People with age esteem recognize that they have choices, that they are masters of their own life.  They may not be able to control what happens to them all of the time or even most of the time, but they take control over how they act or react to what happens.

Age esteemers know they can choose to see what happens as an opportunity or as a catastrophe.  They can choose to be a victim, or they can choose to take action to move beyond the problem, to learn from it and benefit from it.

• Decide that you will become a can do, will do person who takes control.
• Look for the opportunity inside a difficulty.
• Remind yourself that you are in control.

Bonnie Fatio

Do you have an attitude of gratitude?

People with Age Esteem express gratitude.  Age Esteemers know the importance of not only feeling thankful, but also expressing appreciation and gratitude for what they have and what others do for them.  They choose to recognize the blessings of each day, no matter how great or small.

• Keep a gratitude diary where you record the highlights of each day for which you are grateful.
• Count your blessings when things seem difficult.  Remind yourself of all the good that surrounds you while you deal with a problem.
• Express openly to others your gratitude for what they mean to you.

Bonnie Fatio

People with age esteem have a positive attitude.  Studies show that people who enjoy life with a positive attitude live longer and happier lives.  This is not to say that they don’t have aches and pains like anyone else.  They simple choose to take a different view of life.  Rather than focus on their pains, they chose to concentrate on what goes well and to develop their interests.  They are engaged in living.

Age Esteemers know that when we focus on the brighter side of life, we draw other positive people and opportunities to us.

• Become aware of your thoughts and words.  Are they positive or negative.?
• Turn negatives into positives.  When you catch yourself complaining or discouraging yourself, change your phrase to make it positive and encouraging.
• Surround yourself with positive people.  Drop those who hold you back or put you down.  They don’t deserve your time.

Bonnie Fatio

Age Esteem begins when we are children.  Research at Yale University and the American Institute on Aging indicate that the attitude that we have towards age and older people as children influences how we ourselves age.  Children who are raised with a positive attitude and relationship towards older people age better and more healthfully and tend to live longer.

The relationships we have with older people, the language we hear others use to describe older people, and the images that we see illustrating older people will impact our whole life and even contribute to our longevity.

Age esteemers have a positive attitude toward aging.  They embrace it with age esteem.  Age esteemers value, admire and respect age and tend to live longer, happier lives.

Bonnie Fatio

It always puts a smile on my face to see fields of sunflowers in bloom.  They have such a generous attitude.  The sunflower not only shares its beauty as it lifts its face to the sun as though laughing with joy.  – It also provides a landing field for all kinds of airborne insects from bumble bee to butter fly who in turn spread the flower’s pollen.

This is easily understood by people with age esteem.  Age-esteemers also have an attitude of generosity.

• They focus their thoughts on the sunshine, the positive.
• They shine with inner beauty.
• They share their joy of living, and
• They spread their pollen of wisdom.

Bonnie Fatio

Movies are good for us.  They help to enhance our Age Esteem.

• Movies allow us to dream,
• To visit far away places,
• To meet new people and join in rare experiences.
• Movies tickle our emotions,
• Challenge our listening skills and enlarge our vocabulary.
• They teach us, train us and entertain us.
• They create social occasions for us to catch a film with friends.
• And they keep us up with new trends.

Why not enjoy a good movie today?

My best friend Maggie Dull

As we age, best friends continue to hold their special place in our lives.  As children our best friend may have changed daily, but best friends from our teen years remain solid.  Even though we may have little else in common today, our “best friend” relationship continues to unite us.  Maggie, my best friend from High School, and I plan to spend the reunion time together.

Maggie was the Chief of Police’s daughter and I was the Methodist minister’s daughter – so together we could do no wrong.  Heaven knows we tried!  We wanted to be bad, but when we did do something stupid like knock the head off a snowman our guilt drove us to rebuild it almost before the head hit the ground.  Now, 50 years later we still laugh just at the joy of being together.

Contact your old “best friends” today and renew your relationship if you haven’t already done so.  Friends are precious at every age!

Bonnie Fatio

In preparation for the reunion the organizers asked us to send any photos or memorabilia that we might have.  To my surprise, I uncovered an old scrap book waiting to be revisited.  So I have already taken a short trip back to these old friendships and events.  –  And I have found it to be an interesting experience to look back on those high school years as one of the building blocks in my life as I realize how far my journey has taken me since then.

High school memories are wonderful to revisit.  They are important in our lives.  But what is more important is all that we have done following those years to build on them and create the lives that we have today and the dreams we have for tomorrow.

Take a look at your own life.  What lessons did you learn as a teenager and what experiences did you have that have influenced the life you live today?

Bonnie Fatio