Flying Lighter

Since AgeEsteemers are among the millions of travelers who fly, I can’t resist sharing this information concerning efforts being made to diminish costs, economize on fuel and eliminate as much CO2 as possible.

Each pound that can be avoided saves money and energy.  Companies like Swiss Airlines has introduced what they call ecological piloting, reduced the number of spoons on board, and is looking to install lighter seats.  All Nippon Airways has a different approach.  They ask passengers to go to the restroom before embarking in order to lighten the load for takeoff!

The Inter-generational Effect with Bonnie Fatio (l) and Arda Aghazarian (r)

CSW 2010: All about the Inter-generational Factor
by World YWCA Communications Intern Anandi Smith

CSW 2010 Age Esteem and World YWCA

Walking into the Global Action on Aging Office on March 2, 2010 I get a warm greeting from the facilitators Bonnie Fatio and Arda Aghazarian. The office space is beautiful with silk hangings on the wall and large windows. From the front you can see a spectacular view of the UN building and the river.

Women of all ages file in and there appears to be a large number of women from World YWCA CSW 2010 delegation wearing the infamous fuchsia pink scarves. Swiss chocolates, which people make, an immediate dive for is passed around as people start to settle in their seats.

Bonnie Fatio, Age Esteem founder and author introduces the meeting. She wants to create an atmosphere where “age and aging are celebrated”. She tells us that ‘age esteem’ is where she wants to make her dream a reality and wants to encourage and portray a positive attitude towards ageing.

Arda Aghazarian,YWCA in Palestine staff and World YWCA Board member, introduces herself and asks us about our thoughts on age esteem. Numerous people respond and there seems to be a mutual agreement that in society today we are not encouraged to celebrate getting older. In the media for example we seem to be constantly bombarded with products and images to keep us young. Sarah Davies comments that there are certain expectations around age and if we do not abide by them people can be quick to judge. Doris Salah says “the word esteem, you don’t loose your esteem when you grow.”

Bonnie Fatio says “ the relationship to age that we carry follows us everywhere”, negative attitudes such as “old is bad and youth is dynamic” are not healthy. The facilitators tell us that they all want us to participate in an exercise, which will be measured in a symbolic way. Bonnie and Arda stand up at the front of the room and tell us to look at them hypothetically. We are told to raise our right or left hands when different words are used to describe woman. We are told to close our eyes, words such as ‘healthy, intelligent, beautiful wise’ come up and people point in different directions. What we find through this exercise is that you really have to be quite judgmental and ageist when deciding who to choose. Most of the words called out suit both women so people find themselves pointing in both directions. Through the exercise we find that there is a hidden ageism bias in all of us.

The conversation goes onto human rights and how dignity is a part of inner worth. Bonnie asks us how we should grow as leaders and that we should include young women. She says that one should not wipe out the other. Almost on cue Mildred Persinger walks in. (Now 92, Mildred has been a leader of women’s rights for several generations.)  Bonnie goes on to say that a sign of leadership is not passing the torch on but starting a flame that the younger generations can carry for themselves and light others. Getting older should be celebrated.

We then move off into pairs for another exercise and discuss what we gain from either older or younger women. My partner is Bonnie, she describes to me that “ young people have a different energy, they go by a different pace, vocabulary and are a constant learning experience. I tell her that I can learn a lot from older women they have been through all the things I am going through now and I can learn from them.

The thoughts that we are left with at the end of the seminar are how we can work with the older generation and as women we are not pushing a transition of new leaders. We are expected to evaluate and judge people ages but we need to look at it positively. Bonnie gives us a weekly challenge, which is to keep a personal talk diary for one week. It is to look at what we are saying through our mouths and thoughts and to turn our negative thoughts into positive ones. At the end of the session there are relaxed and happy faces all around. I think that the group has learned a lot from the exercises and will not be so quick to judge someone based on their age group and celebrate growing old. I know I will.

Are you a good listener?

Grandparents play an important role as listeners for their grandchildren.  Studies show that an activity with their grandparents most often mentioned by adolescents  is discussing what is on their mind.  Apparently we grandparents are good listeners.  –  But do we listen well enough to the non-verbal as well as the verbal?

At a presentation during a Commission on the Status of Women parallel session last week I heard a 13 year old girl explain that she had been sexually abused for seven years.   The abuser was a family member as is often the case.   She could not bring herself to tell her own mother.   She had no one to confide in.  She explained to us that it was easier for her to now tell us, the audience, than it had been to tell her mother.

No child should experience abuse and no child should have to carry the burden alone, having no one to confide in.

Would you have guessed that something was wrong  if this girl had been your grandchild?  To be truly good listeners for our grandchildren, we need to:

• Love our grandchildren unconditionally; let them know we love them  and will stand by them no matter what happens.
• Really listen to what they say and discuss without judgment.
• Listen actively: nod our head; ask questions that show interest; repeat what the child says; say “hmm” or “I see”.
• Tune into what is not verbally expressed, the child’s body language.   We may even copy her gestures.  Are they congruent with what he says?
• With smaller children, play dolls or stuffed animals with them.   Be conscious of what they are saying as they act and talk with their dolls.
• Remember that good listening and encouragement to share their own thoughts and concerns helps to build your grandchildren’s age-esteem.

As we honor women of the world, I am grateful to the

• Women of previous generations who have opened possibilities and opportunities for me.
• Women who are models of what we can aspire to be, have and do.
• Women who have blazed trails and opened the access to new opportunities  for all women.
• Women who have encouraged, supported and prodded us to take initiative.
• Women who have created space for us to speak up and to speak out, to have a voice that is heard.
• Women who have stepped aside so a younger woman could leave her own prints.
• Women who taught us the importance of our own thoughts and contributions.
• Women of all ages who continue to light the way with age-esteem.

Since I am attending the Commission on the Status of Women at the United Nations with the World YWCA it seems appropriate to share this message.

Happy International Women’s Day,

Bonnie

World YWCA Statement on International Women’s Day
March 8, 2010

Empowering Communities to end poverty and violence against women by 2015

“Some young women understand that violence against women is unacceptable, but many others are financially reliant on the men who abuse them.” This revealing comment was just one of many heard from women and young women participants of the World YWCA Regional Training Institutes held in 2009 on ‘Women Creating a Safe World’.

With women representing 70 percent of the world’s poor (UNIFEM 2008), poverty has a female face and renders them more vulnerable to violence. At least one out of every three women around the world has been beaten, coerced into sex, or otherwise abused in her lifetime (UNIFEM 2008). Violence against women is a global human rights violation and women and girls are susceptible to abuse and violence at every stage of their lives; enhancing their risk of plunging further into poverty.

The impact of violence is devastating for not only women and girls, but also communities in general. It encompasses but is not limited to, physical, sexual and physiological violence, including battering, sexual abuse, dowry-related violence, marital rape, trafficking in women and forced prostitution, labour migration, female genital mutilation and other harmful traditional practises.

Women may bear the brunt of globalisation’s drawbacks and violence; however they are also the world’s greatest untapped resource for turning the tide on economic justice. Research has shown women are more likely to repay loans in full and on time than men. It is established evidence that giving a woman access to primary education will ensure her entire family receives better health care and nutrition. This indicates that providing equal access to education, credit, property and employment for women will ensure economic justice and sustainability for all.

While the World YWCA makes its own contributions through programmes on VAW, SRHR and HIV, development, literacy and gender inequality, the movement continues to call for accountability and commitment towards actions that invest in women and girls.

The Millennium Development Goals (MDGs) cannot be achieved without ensuring commitments contained in the Convention of Elimination of Discrimination Against Women (CEDAW) and the Beijing Platform for Action (BPFA) are also fulfilled. The BPFA can and should be used as a yardstick for evaluating the MDGs and the attainment of gender equality. Together with CEDAW and other international instruments, the goals represent a wider human rights obligation on which YWCAs can call governments to account.

Empowering communities to end poverty and violence against women by 2015 requires a global mobilisation like no other, and it calls upon all sectors to partner with governments to achieve these targets. Everybody has a duty to promote the economic empowerment of women that remove communities and countries from cycles of poverty and violence.

The World YWCA understands that a genuinely Christian perspective is against all forms of violence against women. We can no longer live in a world where women and girls remain in violent relationships to avoid a life of poverty.

We will continue to empower women and young women to end poverty and violence, thus creating a safe world for all.

The World YWCA is a global network of women and young women leading social and economic change in 125 countries. It advocates for peace, justice, human rights and care of the environment, and has been at the forefront of raising the status of women for over a century. The World YWCA develops women’s leadership to find local solutions to the global inequalities women face. Each year, it reaches more than 25 million women and girls through work in over 22,000 communities.

International Women’s Day is a day of global celebration for the economic, political and social achievements of women past, present and future.  Next year, 2011, will mark the 100th anniversary of this celebration.   In some countries like China, Russia, Vietnam and Bulgaria, it is a national holiday.

Source: Earth Calendar

A 100 year old doctor is still delivering babies in Georgia, USA.  He has delivered over 16,000 babies since 1947 when he began his practice.  It seems that everywhere he goes he is greeted by someone who he helped bring into the world.

What is his secret?  Being passionate about what you do!

Other people who have celebrated 100 years of living have shared the same important age-esteem traits.

• Purpose, meaningful activities
• Contact with others of diverse ages
• Keep moving
• Continue to learn and to exercise their mind
• Positive attitude

Today is the International Women of Color Day.  For more information on the significance and origin of this special day, visit
http://www.womenofcolorday.com/htdocs/origins.htm

Source: Earth Calendar

Is there an age limit for air travel?

When I was checking in on-line for my Continental Airlines trans-Atlantic flight today, I was asked to indicate my date of birth.  As I was scrolling down to 1943, I wondered how far back the dates went.  What is the oldest date that they offer as a choice?

It was 1880!  Thank you, Continental.  There is no doubt in my mind that more of us will push the age barriers.  It is refreshing to know that I will still be able to fly with you at the age of 130!

Do you sometimes look into the mirror and feel unloved?

Try this.  Look through and beyond.

It is very easy for us to forget as we look into the mirror that if the glass we look into had no silver in it, then we would be looking not into a mirror at ourselves but  through a window at others. – And we just might realize how well off we are and how desperately the rest of the world needs our love.

A fear of committing ourselves, of taking a step beyond our own comfort zone, often holds us back from offering to others the kind of uncompromising love exemplified by a newborn.  And it is in offering our love that we receive love.

A happy way to experience age-esteem is to

• look beyond yourself to the needs of others,
• stretch out of your comfort zone and
• find a way to share your talents and love with those less fortunate.