Hendrica Okondo, 55, Kenya

AgeEsteem makes me think of feisty, fantastic wise women.

I think my fear of aging is that people will forget that I’m intelligent and I can still do the things I did when I was younger and that they will do things for me instead of ask me.

Hendrica’s Tips: I think the passion to live and just feeling blessed that I’m alive.  I thought I would die at 50.  And here I am meeting all these lovely young people.  I like women especially because there is always a story and they always want to know more about people.  I want to know what their stories are.  That’s what makes me excited.

I am in a line of work that keeps me in contact with like-minded people.  I don’t think it matters where they are.  I’ve met highly powerful women like Michelle Bachelet who is very down to earth and very nice, and I’ve met women in the village in Sudan who were fun to be with just sitting under a tree.  They can laugh at what they went through during the war and still find time to ask whether I have a husband and where are my children.  I think women wherever they are have this personal touch and that is what I love about them.

I think you should affirm yourself and not be concerned with what people think about you.  Just be clear that you are beautiful, not according to the model in the magazine, but beautiful with a good heart.  If you have a beautiful smile it makes it even better.  I think if you pick something you are enthusiastic about, even volunteer, it is good.  I was very inspired by two very important women coming in the other day just to help write certificates for speakers at the Women’s Summit.  That is very inspiring.  It shows just how committed and how engaged they are, which means that they are not sitting at home thinking, I’m lucky I’m bored.  No, they are just ready to go out and help.  It is the kind of thing I find in my village where you find grandmothers who are ready to come to church at any time and to decorate the church. -  They’re ready to do any work that you want them to do.  At the end of it you can all sit around and just laugh.  (I’m sorry you don’t have Hendrica’s contagious laugh live.  She shares it generously.)  I think that laughter just makes it easier.  I have great admiration for the women at the world office of the YWCA .  They work really very hard, and sometimes when things are going terribly wrong they just sit down and laugh.  I think it is a strength that keeps you going.

We need to stay current.  I love my job.  I get to talk about sex to women and they seem very shocked when I do because somehow I don’t think that my face looks like someone talking about sex.  I’m a Catholic, and I love to talk to Catholics about sex, because the Pope should have nothing to say about sex since he doesn’t practice it.  Especially in the continent I work in where we have 6 million young women that were born positive.  They have the virus.  So I get very angry when people say we want a virus free world,   These kids will never lead a virus free life, but they do want to have sex.  They also watch television and they know that relationships are what makes a young person.  If we do not tell them how to protect themselves, we will not reach the target of zero transmission.  They will do it secretly and they will transmit the virus.  This is a reality.  You can’t preach abstinence to someone who already has the virus.  So it becomes very serious work and I believe that women have a right to make decisions about their own bodies.  I definitely think if you want to have an abortion and you have information and you make a conscious decision and you understand the consequences you should have a right to safe and proper services to have the abortion.

Hendrica Okondo is Global manager for reproductive health and rights and HIV, and also the focal point for Africa at the World Office of the YWCA.

Bonnie Fatio

What a bummer to be settled into your seat for a trans-Atlantic flight only to learn that due to engine trouble you are headed back to the gate. – And you must remain aboard  during  two hours of mechanical repairs!  That’s what just happened to us on our return flight to Europe.

And yet, what ended up as a four hour delay also turned out to be an enlightening experience.

Not being one to sit quietly, I stood in the aisle and began chatting with  people.   I even interviewed several on what the term AgeEsteem meant to them as they heard it for the first time.  It’s a great icebreaker as well as an interesting source of information.

These spontaneous conversations also highlighted  the dedication and concern ordinary people have for others.  So much goodness around us.  Among the people I spoke with were two women on their way to Uganda for two weeks to work in a project with children who are HIV positive.  One was a student in International Studies for whom it would be her first experience in Africa.  It was a second trip to the project for the other woman, a banker using her vacation to work at the project.  Her first trip working with these children had changed her whole outlook, giving her a new perspective.on life.  She was eager to return.

Another very special conversation was with a Sister en route « home » to Tanzania where she heads an orphanage for children with Leprosy.  Leprosy is still a very real disease in many parts of the world and the work of this Sister with children and parents who live with Leprosy daily is changing lives and giving hope.

When the announcement came to return to our seats for take-off I was actually disappointed.  It was so inspiring to exchange experiences and life philosophies with these people.  Especially knowing within me that whether or not we ever see each other again, we have each received a gift. – The gift of sharing dreams of a better world.